The Douche is Here!

I finally received my "Douche" cards from Orange32, which I spied at Uncrate. I have the cards, therefore I have the power! Now people will be kindly repaid for their idiocies at my discretion. They are almost too nice to just give out. They also look just like the Medfordist business cards we made up.

Clean Fest '07

Yesterday marks the date of the first major cleaning of the APT for 2007. It had not been clean for at least two and a half weeks before due to me house sitting and deciding to start a little experiment. Squashy/Pumpkinish smell-1, Adam-0. I may look tough, but I am in fact quite weak. I also refused to go into another weekend with food on the table from the previous weekend.

Click the dirty pictures to see them cleaned.

Earlier Today...

Fat Frumpy Bitch

A couple weeks back I posted "The Phantom Caller" on how I was receiving calls from Scott's old number and they lived in Medford. I finally uploaded the video of Scott calling that fat frumpy bitch out, no pun intended. Scott tees off on her and starts throwin' the hay-maker one after another.

The Shit List

When letting the dog in this morning it bounced up the steps in the garage and head butted my cash and prizes. I wasn't happy.

At work I was cutting the wrap off a pallet of Perrier. With my box cutter I went through one of the plastic bottles and it sprayed fucking nasty ass mineral watter all into my eyes. I was little stunned and seriously went blind, it slid my contacts to the side of my eyeballs. My managers loved it.

I used Head and Shoulders for the first time today. Not because I wanted to, but it was the only shampoo they had available. My head has felt like it was on fire for sometime now. How did I forget that?

A Young David Copperfield

Interesting, Sam Ingle claims to be at Oregon State an doing, well, whatever the fuck he does there, probably DotAing or drinking Mountain Dew. But in all actuality it quite evident that he still remains in this valley. In the upper left hand corner of this picture you can see that Sam is doing what his domain states already, Mingling. Apparently Sam was at the South Medford basketball game against North that took place this past Friday, as was Scott and I, but we never met up with Sam. At least you could have say hey, you big fuck.

Psst, how'd you do it? Was is....Real Magic?

Chut Up!

I will be house/dog/cat sitting for the next few days. Nice house, cool cat, and a crud load of goldfish. CRUD! Expect updates. I don't know how many just yet, don't know if I have enough time. MAKE DAT MONEY, HOOO!?!?

Facts. Concerns. Propositions.

Donnie went ahead and threw his sister a bone by naming her the BotY. Strictly charity in my eyes. She speaks gibberish, only understandable to her family and no one else. How is she to reach out to her "fans" if they can't even decipher her "sentences? She shouts for comments then calls us demeaning names when no ones replies. Someones a little big for their britches. Is this the type of mentality we should look forward to in the future from the current reigning BotY? Did our President abandon all others by choosing a family member who had been in the game for such a short time? Was the award even necessary? Fock! WE NEED ANSWERS!

I feel that there are many questions that need to be answered! Is our current "leader" headed in the right direction, as far as his presidency is concerned. Who should retire him? What is to become of our current BotY and will there be more BotY in the years to come? These are just a few.

This SOB was not created to put one above the all others. we share to share, not to gain cred, little molly. Though we have an establisher, who has proclaimed himself as the President despite dropping out of the sphere for a time, we should all be on the same level - status wise. I feel that decisions like BotY should be submitted by all members thus highlighting the favorite blogger by popular demand and creating some sort of social interaction between the SOB, not just some half ass award ceremony where everyone is watching, waiting, drooling, and eventually getting tired of it all.

Ideas? Comments? What say you?!? Fucking let the SOB know by replying or making some sort of post. Scott has! Sean Has! Hell, even Erin posted something! And please, no gibberish.

For the sake of blogger wars, this is strictly for controversy!

Snow What?

I guess that the whole night revolved around "The Wall." We build a huge snow wall on top of a speed bump in front of our apartment. For most of the time people were able to get through "the Corridor" because we had not finished it completely. It wasn't until an hour and forty five minutes later that we had finished. We thought we had something special going on, cars refusing to go through it and trying to kick it over, but then a Ford F-150 strolled through and went through it like it was nothin'. It actually looked kinda puny compared to the rig. We got some good video footage of the whole event and plan on making an uber YouTube. Here are some pictures of the day.

Video soon!

Meddy Town Ballaz

South Medford won the Bass Pro Tournament of Champions in Missouri this evening with a win over Lake Howell, 77-72. The tourney contained eight teams altogether, each ranked in the top 10 for their region or ranked nationally in the top 25. South went in ranked 24th in the U.S. and I believe Relaigh-Egypt was ranked 22nd in the U.S.. This was their first invite to the tournament.

I listened to the games on the radio and would report some scores periodically via twitter. Though it is Singler and Harthun who highlight the team, the other underclassmen were very impressive. There were a number of players who really helped setting the pace and maintaining it throughout the games. The other teams they played (Glendale, Relaigh-Egypt, and Lake Howell) had some incredible players that performed well, South obviously succeeded in finding ways to prevail.

Need I remind you that I still have Kyle Singlers gum? That fool is gonna go far and the gum from his league opener is gonna be worth maaaadd scrilla.

The Line

can make anyonePreface: For each aisle at Costco there is a line marked on the ground for where the pallets must placed. Everyday we walk down each aisle and make sure the edge of the pallet is on the line.

While i was resetting an aisle today there was a pallet that would not match up with the line because it was a pallet not meant for the floor but for the steel. It was sticking out an inch that could easily be hidden, it was sticking out a good half a foot over 'The Line.' I wasn't exactly sure what to do about it, so i asked Jim Crandell, the guy who trained me.

Jim is a dedicated WoWer, as is much of the grave crew at Costco, and prides himself on the fact that he can make almost anyone repeat themselves 5 or more times by simply saying, "What? Huh? Hmm?" You will never meet another bastard like Jim.

So i called Jim over and said, "I need your genius." I told him the situation an dhe had one thing to say. He got in my face, growled and proceeded with,

"Fuck that fucking line, Hagrid. Fuck it."

He then scuttles off, turns back and says, "You didn't know that did ya?"

Hit and Run II

I hit a bird. A Robin with huge red breast's's. Once again there were flippin' oldies right there and I think that they already don't like me because my car is so damn good lookin'. I CAN'T HELP IT! Getting out of my car and moving it off to the side was not an option. Damn devil eyes.

Part I.

The Canundrum

While at work a couple days back something strange happened.

I was in a clear aisle, no pallets needing to be stocked out or trash that need to be picked up. I was putting away a boxed canned pears. There are eight cans per box. I dropeed the box, it split open and all the cans rolled out. I proceeded to pick up all the cans and return them to their box-like home. One can didn't fit. I had nine cans. In the time between the box slipping out of my hand and hitting the ground two, or maybe three, of the cans engaged in an act some would call sex and sprouted a new can of pears. I took out all the cans and put them all back in. I had nine cans. I tried opening a different box: Eight cans. I threw that box and all nine can away. I was scared.

The Phantom Caller

Since I have already made a decent post today, as far as length goes, I'm gonna try to keep it short.

Scott Jeter's old cell number, which was registered in Portland, was 601-0757. A few months back he had to cancel his phone service...Number gone. Now someone else has that number and for a while, up until a few days ago would occasionally call MY number. We always that it seemed familiar, the number that is.

I don't know who she, it's a girl, is or how they (at one point there were multiple people talking) got my number, but it's a real mind fuck. What's really weird is that the P.C. is local. They called while we were at South Medford boys basketball game when they played against South Eugene, and left a voice mail of the entire halftime show. I can only guess that they could have got my number from my Facebook, which is only visible to friends, or they already know and have known us for a while to get both Scott's and my number.

I thought that it could have been Scott pulling some elaborate prank on me using his sister as the P.C., but he swears that that is not the case. In the voice mail they left of the halftime show you can only hear the halftime show, you hear no voices from the audience or anyone sitting near by, so it makes it hard to see exactly where it was coming from, but it was very clear.

Please call 601-0757 and harass them all to hell. I don't care and maybe, just maybe, we'll find out who the face of the Phantom Caller really is.

Song Playing: Trick Daddy's " Take it to Da House."

"Shoeless Joe"

This morning I was delivered my first injury at Costco Wholesale and a Manager was delivered his first accident report.

While stocking out a pallet of pasta at work this morning I was lucky enough to have my foot smashed. I was on the right side of the aisle between a pallet and the the steel*, with the steel on my right. From behind a Forklift comes and begins loading up the left side of the steel. As he turns to his left, the back corner hit the pallet I was stocking out and firmly presses my left foot up against the steel.

I saw Him come around the corner and was very cautious when he was pulling product from the steel. When I started to back up, as he started to pull down product but before the foot smashing, he said, "No worries, Man, I won't hit ya." I stated after that I was just watching the height making sure I was double the height in falling distance, just in case anything fell. As I was looking up is when his forklift hit the corner the pallet. Everything slowed down and as I looked down and saw that my foot was scrunched to hell I thought, " Where did my foot go?"

I'm now known as "Shoeless Joe."

It's pretty sore right now, I'm limping pretty good, and I have an appointment to have it checked out at 2pm. I wonder if I will get a button or sticker stating that I helped end the "Accident - Free" spree? I fucking hope so.

No hard Feelings Scotty.

* Steel is just our term for the storage area in each aisle. It's made of steel. Der?

Shit, Son!

New Transformers trailer. F-A-H-Q! Chargers, Helicopters, fucking semis: All changelings. Did I spy Optimus Prime? They truly are more than meets the eye.

"Bumper Sticker of the Week."

What Time Is It!?!

DUDES NIGHT OUT!!!

Scott's 21st "slash" New Years was a blastie. After Pizza we headed on out to Howie's. One Don Hunt puchased Scott a drink, and soon after the ambitious Scooter just might have found his soul mate. I'm so proud of you Scott. Then we headed out to the Rotbart's. A magnificent event, Sean and Dustin, well played.